Getting It Right …


No MistakesGoing back to my roots for this one …

At one time, I was quite enamored of all things Richard Bach … yes, even the seagull:)  It was a thing we did, if we were of a certain age at a certain time in certain places and contexts.  

However, Bach wrote more than just Jonathan Livingstone Seagull.  This quotation comes from one of his other works, as I remember.

So to business …

NO MISTAKES?  This seems a bit much to accept, doesn’t it?

I can list a number of events from my life that definitely felt like mistakes, at the time and usually long afterward.   I have hurt others with my words and actions.  I have cost myself and others money, time, and energy.  I have failed to do what I know is right on more occasions than I am comfortable thinking about.

Over the course of things, I would imagine most of us make more “mistakes” than we get it right.

This is not surprising when you take into account a reality:  

EVERYONE IS LIVING THEIR LIVES FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME

Unless you ascribe to reincarnation or some other philosophy that allows multiple changes to get it right, we only get one chance to do each thing.  Now we might get another chance tomorrow to do that same thing, but it is not the chance we have today, but a new round at the same issue or topic.

Bach’s main point seems that we learn from our mistakes, so they are not mistakes in the eternal sense of the word, but rather “life adjustments“.  You know, those conversations that usually begin with some form of “I’m sorry …” or “You know, that didn’t work out like I wanted it to …”

Those of us who have attempted to create strong and intimate relationships through marriage, alliance, parenting, or friendship should welcome the news that we get to make adjustments.   The mistakes we make with one person or situation are part of what allows us to get it right in another situation or with another person.

I know of NO perfect relationships or situations, so we are all works in progress.

A quick note to the younger folks in the audience:

AGE DOES NOT EQUAL ABSENCE OF MISTAKES

I know older folks often seem like they have achieved that blissful state where all goes well every day because they know how to live without problems, but that is an act in itself.

We’re just calmer about making our mistakes now, because we recognize they are continual pop quizzes on how to do life and are essential to getting the right answers at the end.

How have you made and how are you making mistakes?

What are you learning from your mistakes?

What mistakes do you wish you had made?

You can catch up with Richard Bach HERE and you will not regret spending a few minutes with this thoughtful truth seeker.

Trying both to remember and forget all my past and current mistakes at the same time in the Heartland …

John

Image:  Gratisography.com – A great source of creative and unique photographs

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“No Such Thing” …


No Such Thing - Gratisography.jpg

 

This may come as a shock, but I have made mistakes in my life … some real doozies, as they say.   Maybe you have too … after all, “To err is human”, as Pope says and since we are all humans, we probably all err.   

“TO ERR IS HUMAN, TO FORGIVE, DIVINE (Alexander Pope)

Actually, most of us seem to have the “erring” part of this quotation down.  It’s the “forgiving” part where we need some work:).

MAKING MISTAKES IS ONE OF THE COMMONALITIES OF LIFE …

Actually, accomplishing things almost always involves two important factors:  Taking risks and Failing.  Since both appear linked to doing things, we ought to be more comfortable navigating the terrain of failure, shouldn’t we?

What sets some people apart from others is how they handle making mistakes. Now I am no expert on how to handle mistakes, although I do hold advanced amateur standing. 

Here are some of my general ground rules for making mistakes:

DON’T BE A WUSS … ERR BIG …

Not like in a current popular song, but in this respect:  If you are going to dare and risk, might as well do it large, rather than inch along trying to stay safe and secure.

Erring big, in this case, does also not mean to take unnecessary or inappropriate risks, especially concerning people’s physical and emotional well-being.  I am encouraging you to take what might be called calculated risks.

APOLOGIZE LIKE YOU ARE REALLY SORRY …

Many of our public figures, especially pop culture celebrities and politicians need to tattoo this to the inside of their eyeballs.   An insincere or false apology is no better than denying responsibility for whatever you just caused.

Note:  this one requires that you understand, accept, and are actually sorry for what you did … not just that you were caught doing it.

CREATE THE ABILITY IN YOURSELF TO ANALYZE YOUR MISTAKES HONESTLY …

When we err, and we will err, we owe it to ourselves and others to quickly move through the process of identifying our mistakes, analyzing them for possible solutions or resolutions, and adjusting to insure smoother sailing as we continue on.  

This requires that we become very honest with ourselves about what we have done and what we have not done, and the further ability to get past the emotion and learn from what has occurred.

NURTURE YOUR OWN RESILIENCE …

Having the ability to bounce back from our mistakes is an essential part of developing as a person.  The more effectively we learn to deal with our “oops” as temporary lapses to be overcome, the more we are able to “dust ourselves off” and move on, using that learning to make better mistakes in the future.

Remember, coping is not about eliminating errors or mistakes, along with the discomfort and pain they often bring, but about learning how to survive the instances and thrive in the long run.

One excellent source to help you learn how to increase and nurture your personal resiliency is The Bounce-Back Quotient by Linda Nash.   This is a useful and easy-to-read tool to help you determine and enhance your personal resilience profile.

SO WHAT WOULD YOU ADD TO, AMEND OR CHANGE, OR ARGUE FOR REMOVING FROM THIS LIST?  

Trying very hard to be very positive when things go very negative in the Heartland ….

John

 

 

The Bounce Back Quotient at